one of my all time fav movies

I enjoy the beautiful strong woman that are prtrayed in this movie. lord of the rings. they are gental and respectful and lovely and feminine as god made us. I have similar hair.

i was thinking today...

my friend sherri is now a married woman. she is now part of that exclusive club some of the people of the planet belong to. she has gotten the proposal and picked out invitations. She has picked her flowers and gone all over trying to find the dress. she has had her bachelorette party. and put on her white dress and veil and done her hair and had that excitment of knowing its her wedding day. Shes seen her dad all misty as he gives her away. she has seen her friends and loved ones wave goodby as she goes to her honeymoon suite.

I imagine that my sweet friend , my dear friend, has been waiting for it her whole life never truely beleiving that she would be really with someone for the rest of her days. But now she knows better she has seen the light . Many things have happened in her life and I am so greatful to see her truely living her life. I care for her and Love her with all of my heart. i have been watching her life from the sidlines for awhile not really being able to participate and i miss her so much. But i know that she is joyful and that makes me happy.

the pic i put on there is one of sherri and kelly and me.

Story Two- Part Two

I raced down the stairs not being patient enough to wait for my all too willing elevator. I laughed to myslef, Jed was always a little on the dramatic side. What could be so interesting that he had to wake me.
Jed was standing there leaning on the counter where the security guard sat with his serious but skeptical look. For he knew that Jed would not be able to make it past him. Jed was always a little on the sexy side, with the pearly green eyes and lips that you wanted to touch with your lips and your tounge, to taste them... I shook my head a bit to focus and not be sucked in to my thoughts. I looked Jed straight in the eyes and saw a flicker of sex in them, and then he realized i was truely looking at him and he looked down with a shy half crooked smile.
"Addy lets go I feel like I've been waiting for a million years. I mean look as this city, so many low lifes, not good enough to have you walk by them," Jed said as we were closing the door and I looked at him with a soft smile creeping onto my face. Jed was just a little bit taller than me and he never used to look like he does. I mean to say that he used to look so normal. No not normal heaven forbid he be that. I have known him since I was 15 years old and he knows I can see through all of the masks he has for the world. His hair used to be this medium to dark brown color but now it had a hint of red and it was slicked back before , but now he had it all punked out. I liked it either way. I always found it so funny that he was so self conscience of how he looked and would say he wasnt anything to look at, when in reality girls always looked at him and wanted him. He would never admit this of course foe he had always only had eyes for me. Every other girl which lets be honest there hadnt been many , were just a distraction. He secretly wished we would end up back together.

Story Two- Part 1

The night was dark and dingy , there was light that shone through a window in my apartment that night, revealing the break of dawn aproaching. I push a dark strand of ebony hair that was down to my waist, just behind my ear as I yawned for the millionth time. I looked at the clock on the stove in the kitchen and it was nearly 4am. Why were nights always like this for me I wondered, as a streched my long slender legs while I sat on the floor. I was so bored of my life, nothing seemed to excite me nothing really happened well at least not to me anyway. I looked down at my knees with my blue eyes and pulled them up to my chin as I hugged them to my chest. I guess it was time to go to sleep and see if I would actually be able to dream.
It had only seemed like meere minutes had past when I was awoken to the sound of my cell phone ringing beside my head.
"Addy is that you?" my friend Jed said on the other end of the phone. I nodded and then realaized that he couldnt see me and said"yes J but I have barely gotten any sleep. what do you need?" ,I said sleepily into the the phone.
"You wont believe what I saw. You have to come with me right now, Im downstair at your front door but your doorman wont let me in," Jed said with exasperation. New York city doorman were a wonderful thing sometimes they kept out the ones you wanted to see and those you didn't . I smiled to myself and then replied, " ok J , Ill be right down." I pressed the red end key on my cell phone and put it in my purse and threw on a clean shirt and some black pants and my shoes, while tying my hair back with my hair elastic from the night before. One quick look in the mirror on the wall by my door and I felt like there was nothing more I could do to improve my look so I put my favorite green hoodie, with a picture of a fairy on and opened the old wooden door that had a handle that seemed to always stick when you locked it.

Part two- Story 1

When I first met him, well the first time we spoke was online on the internet. I was on this online dating site and I had met a few men but nothing stuck or even really caught my interest. Then I got this message from a guy who just messaged me out of the blue. I really wasn't paying too much attention and I told him my name and he said to me that he was really excited about it. I asked why and he said when he was a little boy that he had always wanted to be with a girl named Ella. I thought that was sweet, he asked me to meet him the next day so I said sure.
The next day when I was waiting for Jake at the park where he wanted me to meet him, I was a little nervous. I also remember being really thirsty. It was such a beautiful day in June with warmth in the air. Nothing was really known about this man I had willed myself to wait for except that he was going to be driving a white truck. The picture on his profile was not very clear so i didnt really know what he looked like for sure.
I was waiting for him at a picnic table and started to get antzy , so I started to walk around shading my eyes from the sun. With each sound of a vehicle approaching, I would look even more frantically. Then for some reason I couldn't remember what Jake had said he was driving or what color it was. So I started getting more and more nervous. Why was I getting all worked up over someone I had never even seen before, but it felt different, like it mattered or something. Then out of the corner of my eye, I noticed this man who was wearing sunglasses and leaning on a white truck, was watching me as I paced back and forth. If only I had known then what I know now. If only I trusted people more back then, then maybe now in the present, things wouldnt be the way they are now.
Those moments are burned into my mind forever. I feel some regret in this life I have now but also I possess knowledge which I didnt have then. I know the lonelyness and the longing I have felt. Why are people such fools and so eagar to jump into things with people who they barely even know their name? I watch my friend now who is so miserable and my heart goes to him. For he has true sadness. The two of us have known each other for quite a number of years now and we know each other inside and out. We have seen each other at our worst moments and survived. Yes the word survive is a word that seems to ring true to alot of us. Its a word that we live by sometimes and don't even know that we are meerly living on the brink of only scraping by. For me I know that I have allowed myself to live emotionally starved and squashed for what I really want.
We dont allow ourselves to admit feelings that we bottle up and lock up and throw away the key. Well at least hide it from harms way and then we dont even know how to open up anymore. I dont mean to sound jaded but life and relationships of any nature can be more than we bargined for. Fear is a funny thing. It keeps us at arms length from what we truely need or want. It stops us from living and moving forward, sometimes even from breathing. As I write this , I pause and allow myself to feel. Such soft waves of grace surround the world. If only we looked for it we wouldnt have to be alone.

Part One- Story 1

Today there is a man who walks the world alone. I know him well, he is a person who is so tender hearted that he wears his heart on his sleeve. That in its self isnt bad but the one thing is that he gets hurt. I will tell you a bit about me. I am a girl who seems to live agelessly. I am always told that I look like I am either a senior in high school or just graduated, which is nice because I am at least 12 years out of high school. My hair has changed many colors over the years and at the moment its a dark brown which was dyed a black with a bit of warmth added. A friend of mine recently looked at my hair and said she was jealous of how my hair hadn't faded. I wish i could tell her that there is this secret reason why and that there was a solution but like most things in life, that is not the case.
We do this as humans alot. We get it into our heads that everything is the way it is for a reason that is to make sense, and works in our favor somehow. Boy are we ever wrong. I mean since when is life that layed out and perfect. Yes thats right everyone, I get everything I ever want and nothing ever goes wrong. I laugh to myself and think if only that were true. Anyways, I digress, I was telling you about this man that I know.
Today had not been a very good day for him. There have been some girl toubles that he has been having and now she wont talk to him. I care for him so much. But what can you do. Maybe I'll start at the beginning. I have been in love very few times where it has been a for real thing and not some painful infatuation. We are so good at fooling ourselves of love arent we. Its the simple boy meets girl, he sees her beauty and she sees his charm and he sees her sparkle she sees him laugh and the sparks fly. The next part is always a bit more tricky though. I'm sure alot of you out there know what comes next. Yes there comes a date or two then that dreaded thing that we call reality seeps in and starts to put a crack in our mirrored image of what we think we see.

more to come.... this is a story i am writing

A special one

Life is full of so many things a magical mystery for us to unwrap from moment to moment.

What is it that inspires us to keep peering in to find out what we dont know? Is it the anticipation of the unknown tapping at us from all angles?

I sit here and think that I cant help but want to bring all of my sweet and funny and strange friends around me. I miss those that are away.

They bring out the interest of that unknown stuff. I will always look on facebook and want to see how they are.

I have a particular friend names sherri my little belt loops and sunflower seeds lady. My Sherri berri. I have known this lady for many years now. For over half of my life. She is the one who really changed me in so many ways. I know men in my life have changed me but Sher is such a pure and loving heart. Yes we bug each other like sisters. We have the rivalry and the competition. But we also have the warmth and the tender heart of pure love and compassion. In every time in my life where I really needed something or someone or didnt know how to say something or really wanted divine guidence, I always turned to her. Sher is the most driven and one of the most beautiful women of gods lovely daughters.

Sherri has lived out her life in many ways and things arent always easy for her, she gets obstacles like all of us but she isnt afraid to live. And she really desires to hear the promptings from god and she listens for him. And she captures beauty so well in her pictures.

I love you darling